Tuesday, November 2, 2010



Whenever I get the time (which is not a lot) I try to spend some quality time with 'Gears of War 2', a 3rd person futuristic shooter. It's based on a pretty simple concept: Take cover, shoot aliens, repeat. There are no puzzles, no extensive lever pulling or complicated labyrinths. Just a linear story with linear roads leading to one linear target: blowing alien heads.
So after about 3 hours of play, just as you start getting the pace and the controls, suddenly your space marine is being transported into a whole different game. instead of utilising his 20 years of space warfare experience, your character awkwardly avoids rocks and balls like a Wii platformer.

This is absolutely criminal.

For all you non-gamers out there, try this: so you're having sex, right? You're sliding and grinding and having a jolly good time. Suddenly your partner stops, jump out of bed and says: 'OK, in order to continue with the fun sex-having you must first juggle these three balls for 15 seconds'. How frustrated are you now?? I'm not saying that juggling is not fun, hell, I used to go to a juggling after-school club (just twice, relax), but when I sign up for sex, I wanna get sex. It's simply the way it works.

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